I came to South Africa because of Shri Radha Govind Ashram, PMB. The couple from this ashram had taken my shelter as a disciple and wanted me to spread the holy name of Shri Radha & Krishn. It was my first spiritual awakening tour here in South Africa. This couple was living a laborious spiritual life and was enthusiastic to learn more about Hindu Religion.

Unfortunately, there were some conflicts between their thoughts and that of mine.  As I spend more time with them, I found myself bounded. It was because of their views as well as their behavior. I tried my best to explain everything to this couple but all my efforts were going in vain. They were not ready to listen and sticked at their meaningless point that When we are hosting you and spending money and energy then you shall follow us only. They didn’t want me to go to meet other devotees who were their anti. When I went to meet other devotees this couple said, “Gurudev (i.e. me) has betrayed us, he has lied while we were hosting him.”

Earlier also , I had tried to make them understand that one cannot control his/her Guru in anyway. I am not a professional musician who will sing for one company only because I have signed the contract. But they blamed me every time saying that, “In Indian tradition, one should respect their host and should not visit their host’s enemies”.

If you have invited your Guru to come to you and enlighten you. And for the same you have made arrangement for his stay and everything else.  Will you call this “hosting him” or “serving him”? It is an important point which I want every devotee, and especially my followers, should understand very clearly. I don’t want that any of my disciple and follower shall use such nonsense and act in such a stupid way in future.

Let me explain this by an example- There was a father with two sons. Both sons hate each other and don’t like to see each others face. Father had tried everything to sort out the troubling issues between them but nothing worked. Suppose, elder son is taking care of his father. Now,

*  Does father has to take elder son’s permission to meet his younger son?
* Can the elder brother say to his father that - “Don’t meet the younger brother. I am feeding you and taking care of you. I am your host.  Don’t meet my envy“?
* Can the elder brother ask for some money from his younger brother to meet the father?

Now use your intelligence and tell me- What will you call it?? ‘Control on father’ or ‘unconditional service to father’? Can son HOST his father?

According to me, son should serve his father and not control his father or put any condition for his service. We don’t host our family, we host only guests. Further, if father meets his younger son, without intimating his elder son and the elder son, after finding this, throws the belongings of his father out of his house. What will you call this behavior? Isn’t it Ego?

Can he say that his father has cheated him by meeting the younger son without permission?  Can he say that—“I am bearing all your expenses and the younger son has done nothing for you. If the younger son wants to meet you, he should bear at least half the expenses.’ Can he blame his father as -a cheat, a bogus, a liar for what he has done. Can he?? Now the question comes, who can control whom? According to Hindu religion, Son can’t control his parents because son is a part of parents. He always has to follow them, no matters what they do or ask. But father can control his son because he is his father and more elder to him. And he knows everything better then his kid. Lord Ram and Lord Krishn are the best example of that. They never disobeyed their parents.

How fight starts between young boy and parents in the present world? Young boy starts thinking that he knows everything and feels like his parents are ruling him. He believes what he is doing is right.  But actually parents have more experience. They have gone through all such things so they tell & advice their children for their betterment. Now if one won’t listen to his parents and won’t even give them the chance to teach him then he is actually disobeying his parents and being Stubborn. If you say to your parents that-“ I know, I am right” and stick to it despite of your parent’s advice then obviously you are disrespecting your parents. You are not giving them the chance to teach you. When one feels that he is right and intelligent then he actually closes the door for everyone to tell him why he is wrong. That is the time when conflicts starts and one’s ego grows which leads him to the darkness.

It is a materialistic story but if you take it in a spiritual way, Guru is the spiritual father. When you take initiation you surrender yourself and you make the very divine relationship with your Guru. He becomes your father and you become his disciple. Now who is supposed to follow? The Guru  or The disciple? If disciple is saying that –“Guru dev!  you think you are right, please think again, because  I think I’m right”. It shows that he has not surrendered to his Guru. He is still following his own things and he doesn’t want to follow his Gurudev. He is being stubborn and thinks that he is more intelligent then his Spiritual Master. I remember one more story from Gita. When Arjun was on the one side, asking Lord Krishn to show him the right path and on the other hand he was arguing with Him. Then Lord Krishn told him, if you really want to listen then surrender first. After surrendering Lord Krishn very firstly spoke about Karma Yog because of Arjun’s attitude. What is Karma Yog?

“Karma Yog is selfless service unto humanity. Karma Yog is the Yog of action which purifies the heart and prepares the Antahkarana (the heart and the mind) for the reception of Divine Light or attainment if Knowledge of the Self. The important point is that you will have to serve humanity without any attachment or egoism.” The practice of Karma Yoga prepares the aspirant for the reception of knowledge of the Self. It makes him a proper Adhikari (aspirant) for the study of Vedanta. Ignorant people jump at once to Bhakti Yog or Jnana Yog, without first having a preliminary training in Karma Yog. That is the reason why they fail miserably to realize the Truth. Various impurities lurk in the fourfold mind (Antahkarana). The mind is filled with likes and dislikes, jealousy, etc. They indulge in all sorts of useless controversies, vain debates and dry, endless discussions. Their philosophy is only on their lips. In other words, they are arrogant.

A man who is easily irritable and who can easily be offended for trifling things is absolutely unfit for the path of Karma Yog. He should have all the organs under perfect control. He should lead a very simple life. He should bear insult, disrespect, dishonour, censure, infamy, disgrace, harsh words, heat, cold and the pain of diseases. He should have absolute faith in himself, in God, in scriptures and in the words of his Guru. If he leads a life of luxury, if he wants everything for himself, how can he share his possessions with others? He should burn his selfishness to the very root. Let me remind you the words of the Gita: “Restraining and subduing the senses, regarding everything equally, rejoicing in the welfare of all, these alone come to Me.” Such a man becomes a good Karma Yogi and reaches the goal quickly.

If you organise programs and do something FOR YOUR GURU, it is known as service to your Guru not hosting. Not a single disciple can control his Guru by saying that, Guru, if you will go there then I will leave you. It shows if Guru will go there then your EGO will get hurt. You can’t host ( or control) your Guru. As a disciple, you can only serve him unconditionally. And as a father, he is free to choose wherever he wants to go because he is not the father of one son. So please be clear, a single disciple shall not take himself as a host. If you have really surrendered yourself to your master, the word ‘I’ should not exist. What is the use of this word now?  What is making you so egoistic? Have you forgotten Gita and Bhagwatam?

There is still one point left— If I went to see another son (devotee) without asking them- Had I lied to them?

Firstly, when I went to meet my disciples, this couple didn’t ask anything to me and I also didn’t speak anything to them. So it was not telling a lie. Secondly, if one has a problem with other person, that is his personal materialistic problem, he should not bind his relatives, friends and others, especially his Spiritual master, to follow his wish.

Also, according to Mahabharat Udyog parv, one can speak lie in 8 circumstances. One of those 8 circumstances is when one is going for Hari Katha or to attend lord’s program.

“Leave them those who keep you far from devotees and God because they are being conditional and trying to control you”. Skand Puran 5.5.18

The example are given also, Bali Maharaj had rejected his Guru Shukracharya. Vibhishan rejected his relatives, Prahalad Maharaj rejected his father, Bharat rejected his mother, Brijwasis rejected God Indra, Gopies rejected their husbands.

Even IF you are hosting a Guru, ved says, “Atithi devo bhava” which means “Guest is your God”. But such thing could happen when they were NOT my disciple but even on that time also, such insult would harm the host. Because you are not allowed to treat your guest badly in any way. The exact vedic hymn is,

Dharmam charah satyam vada adhyanaat ma pramati-tavyam
Matri devo bhavah Pitr devo Bhavah Acharya devo Bhavah Atithi Devo Bhavah

“Follow dharma, speak truth, and never show your laziness to study the scriptures, Mother is like God, Father is like God, Spiritual Master is like God and Brahmin Guest is like your God.“

This couple loves their material parents but forgot how to behave with Spiritual parent. If you cannot think of insulting your material father because he is your father then how can you even think to do such thing with your spiritual father and put the conditions? I was thinking, if one day their father/son will go to enimies house then what this couple will do?

When you don’t know how to pay respect to your Guru, then I doubt on the existence of your very so-called spiritual life. Always understand, Spiritual father is far superior then your parents. Always pay your respect and follow your guru order’s as God order. If you won’t and start to insult your Guru then get ready for the punishment from God & Guru, if you don’t believe then watch this couple’s future to learn a lesson.

Devotees ask me often, who is the Supreme Godhead? Is Krishn Supreme Godhead? Is Vishnu Supreme Godhead? Are Krishn and Vishnu same or different? Is Lord Shiv Supreme? Is Shakti Supreme Goddess? Today I am thinking to clear all devotees’ doubts. I will write here all the differences and try to let you know why our sects have differences. (I won’t talk what Sampraday Acharyas said. If you want to know the answer ‘why I’m not’. Read this article)

As all of you know we have some main scriptures. 3-4 Vedas, 18 Purans and 17 sub-Purans, 19 smirities (law books)

But the problem is, “Shurti Bhinna Smirti Bhinna” Ved have differences, law books have differences and Puran also speak different things. So I will try to talk about Purans here because they talk about Supreme Godhead.Ved talks about Brahm and Smritis talk about Gayatri mantra and how to save ourselves from any offenses.

1. According to Brahm-vavrta Puran, Lord Shri Krishn is the Supreme Godhead and Supreme Personality. He resides in Golok Dham and from Him Lord Vishnu, Lod Shiv and Lord Brahma incarnated. Lord Vishnu is the part of Lord Krishn according to this Puran who works for Lord Krishn. Lord Vishnu resides in Vishnu-lok (Vaikunth) and He is the organ of all universes.

2. According to Padma Puran, Lord Vishnu is the Supreme Godhead. First of all, He had born Prakati, afterwards, Mahatatv, Tan-matra, Panchbhut. From His naval-ring, Lord Brahma had born who created the world.

3. According to Brahm Puran and Shri Harivansh Puran, Lord Narayan is the Supreme Godhead. First of all he made the water; by His power he had manifested one big golden egg in the water. From that egg Lord Brahma appeared who designed the world.

4. According to Vishnu Puran, Lord Vishnu is the Supreme Godhead. First of all, Lord Vishnu had born two personalities Prakati and Purush and all emotions. By their mixing one golden egg appeared, from that egg Maha-Virat or Maha-Vishnu came out. He divided into 3 forms, Brahma, Vishnu and Shiv to create the world.

5. According to Narad Puran, Maha-Vishnu is the Supreme Godhead who appeared in the three forms Purush, Prakarti and Time. These forms started to create the world and later changed into Brahma, Vishnu and Mahesh.

6. Srimad Bhagwatam Puran, Lord Hari is the Supreme Godhead who created the Maya first. From Maya Mahtatv, Tanmatras and Pancabhut appeared. By their mixings Golden egg appeared, from that egg Maha- Purush appeared. From Maha-Purush (Virat-Purush) all Gods, Goddesses, Demons, Human beings etc appeared.

7. According to Markandeya Puran, Param-brahm-Prameshwar is the Supreme Godhead who born Prakati first. By her support Mahtatv, Tanmatras and Pancabhut appeared. By everyone support golden egg manifested. From golden egg Brahma, Vishnu and Mahesh came out who are the creator, maintainer and destroyer of the world.

8. According to all Shiv Purans like Ling Puran, Shiv Puran etc, Lord Shiv is the Supreme Godhead. Who incarnated as a light in the beginning of this world. He born Shakti first then Mahtatv, Tanmatras and Pancabhut appeared by Him and later He born Brahm and Vishnu who started to create and maintain the world.

9. According to Devi Bhagwat, Goddess Shakti is the Supreme Personality. From her Brahma, Vishnu and Shiv appeared, and she distributed the work to them.

10. According to Ganesh Upnishad, Lord Ganesh is the Supreme Godhead and Brahma, Vishnu and Shiv manifested from Him only who respectively are the creator, maintainer and destroyer of the world.

11. In few scriptures as well as Veds Lord Sun is the only Supreme Godhead.

Confused? Don’t be now I will speak minute stuff which will make you more confused.

1. Purushamevedam sarvam eko RUDRO na dwitiyaay vidyate |
These Vedic Mantras mean “there is only one PURUSH who is creator, sustainer and annihilator of this Infinite Cosmos. THAT PURUSH is RUDRA ( BHAGAVAN SHANKAR ). ’’
In NILARUDRA Upanishad, it is said that – “ those who differentiate between BHAGAVAN VISHNU and BHAGAVAN SHANKAR goes to the darkest region of Maya.

2. Mahabharat contains Srimad Bhagwat Gita in where Lord Krishn said, He is the Supreme Personality but in same Mahabharat, In the Anushasana Parvan, Book 13, we find this prayer to Shiv:
yo asrijad dakshinad angad brahmanam loka-sambhavam
vama-parshvat tatha vishnum loka-rakshartham ishvarah
yugante chaiva samprapte rudram angat srijat prabhuh
‘He is the Lord (ishvara) who from his right side created Brahma the creator of the world and from his left side created Vishnu for the protection of the world. And at the end of the Yuga the mighty Lord creates Rudra from his body.’

In the other story in Mahabharat, Lord Vyas Dev tells Kauravs that Parshuaastra (weapon of Shiv) won’t give any harm to Lord Krishn because Lord Krishn is Lord Shiv’s devotees.

”The blessed Vishnu said: “I salute Mahadeva. Salutations to Thee. O Thou that art eternal origin of all things. The Rishis say that Thou art the Lord of the Vedas. The righteous say that Thou art Penance, Thou art Sattwa, Thou art Rajas, Thou art Tamas, and Thou art truth.” (The Mahabharata, Anusasana Parva Section XIV)

3. According to Srimad Bhagwatam, Lord Krishn- Narayan- hari is the Supreme Godhead but Srimad Bhagwatam reveals this also

SB 8.12.39: My dear Lord Śambhu, who within this material world but you can surpass My illusory energy? People are generally attached to sense enjoyment and conquered by its influence. Indeed, the influence of material nature is very difficult for them to surmount.

SB 8.7.31: O Lord Girīśa, since the Brahman effulgence is transcendental to the material modes of goodness, passion and ignorance, the various directors of this material world certainly cannot appreciate it or even know where it is. It is not understandable even to Lord Brahmā, Lord Viṣṇu or the King of heaven, Mahendra.

SB 8.7.32: When annihilation is performed by the flames and sparks emanating from your eyes, the entire creation is burned to ashes. Nonetheless, you do not know how this happens. What then is to be said of your destroying the Dakṣa-yajña, Tripurāsura and the kālakūṭa poison? Such activities cannot be subject matters for prayers offered to you.

SB 8.7.33: Exalted, self-satisfied persons who preach to the entire world think of your lotus feet constantly within their hearts. However, when persons who do not know your austerity see you moving with Umā, they misunderstand you to be lusty, or when they see you wandering in the crematorium they mistakenly think that you are ferocious and envious. Certainly they are shameless. They cannot understand your activities.

4. Vishnu puran 5.33.46
Yo hariH sa ZivaH sakSad yaH zivaH sa svayamM hariH
Ye tayor bhedamAti stahan narakAya bhave nnaraH
Whoever is Lord Hari, He Himself is Lord Shiva indeed.
Any human being mistakes both the lord to be different, he/she surely go to hell

——————————————————————————–

Are you confused now? Confusion creates questions. My questions are given below which shall be considered:-

1. We say infact it is written in the scripture, Srimad Bhagwatam is the essence of the Purans. Question comes here… In Bhagwatam there is not a single story from any Shiv’s Purans. How can it be an essence when from 17 Purans, half of them are not there? Right?

2. According to scriptures, one who sees the moon of Ganesh Chaturthi gets the wrong blame in the future. Once Lord Krishn saw that and got the blame on Him that He killed and robbed ‘Mani’.Gem). Later Lord Krishn had proved that he didn’t do that. Since that all devotees never see the Ganesh Chaturthi moon. Eventually all Gods hide themselves inside their deity rooms on this particular day from the moon. When Lord Krishn appeared on the earth, and spread the message everywhere that He is the only Supreme Godhead, then why did he get affected by that moon who belongs to Lord Ganesh?

3. Mainly Lord Krsna, Lord Shiv and Sri Durga Maa are only three supreme personalities which are mentioned in scriptures. There are other two also, and incarnation of Lord Shiv, Sankaracharya put these 5 idols on the altar for worship. He didn’t want us to get confused and start to fight who is Supreme. If we accept one scripture then second scripture is definitely wrong for us which is an offense. So to finish that offense, He put these five Gods on the altar.

4. In our hindu calander, Kartik and Vaishakh months are dedicated to Lord Krishn, Saavan to Lord Shiv and two Nav durgas to Sri Durga Maa. Not other months are dedicated to any other Devta.

5. Lord Shiv meditates Lord Krishn, Lord Krishn meditates Sri Radha ji. So who is Supreme?

6. Lord Shiv worships Lord Krishn and Lord Krishn worships Lord Shiv. However, Sri Durga never worshiped them.

7. In many Purans and our vedic scriptures it is clearly mentioned that Lord Krishn and Lord Shiv worshiped Sri Durga. Why did Lord Krishn or Lord Shiv do that when they were Supreme?

8. Only focus on those shloks which has our stuff in them doesn’t mean we can deny other shloks and facts.

9. When Lord Krsn is ONLY Supreme Godhead then why did He worship Lord Shiv for Sudarshan Chakra. Sudarshan Chakra used to belong Lord Shiv only. After got happy by Lord Krishn tapsaya Lord Shiv gave his Charkra to Him. (Shiv Puran)

10. Could you show me any shloks where Lord Krishn worshiped His other devotees and sang a prayer for them?

11. Did Lord Krsna sang a prayer for any other devta? Why Lord Krishn worshiped only Lord Shiv and Sri Durga?

12. Worship of Shiv take us to Krishn. Worship to Krishn take us to Sri Radha(form of Durga) Who is actually Supreme? Shiv? Krsn? Durga?

13. In the Shiv Rahasya Chapter in the Skanda Purana, there is a shloka of 40 verses where Vishnu praises Lord Shiv as the Ultimate truth etc. but srimad bhagwatan says Lord Krishn is the Ultimate truth.

14. In Padma Puran it is written, Lord Ram installed Rameshwar (Lord Shiv) deity and worshiped Him. On the second hand, Valmiki Ramayan is silent. Now either Padma Puran is right or Valmiki Ramayan.

15. Why does Lord Krishn praised Lord Shiv and Durga Maa as ‘THE ORGIN OF THE CREATION’ several times? He didn’t praise anyone else like that. What was the reason which made Lord Krishn to speak that? Did He lie? I guess He never Lies. Right? On the one hand He is saying He is Supreme. On the Other Hand He is praising THEM Supreme also.

16. When Lord Vishnu is the part of Lord Krishn according to Brahmvavrta Puran but on the other hand Vishnu and other Purans say that Lord Krishn is the part of Godhead Vishnu, then who is Supreme? Is Golok Supreme or Vaikunth?

There are so many questions and so many differences in Purans, I can write a good book on that. But let me tell you the answer of all questions.

Never do worship of Shiv because He is Vaishnav. It is somehow you are committing offense. Ok He is Vaishnav but in many Scriptures it is also mentioned that Lord Krishn worshiped Lord Shiv. So should we worship Lord Krishn as the greatest SHAIV? NO. We should worship both of THEM as The Supreme Personalities.

I do not see any point in arguing then that this idol is supreme compared to the other idols unless I forget what the ideal behind the idol stands for. This is the reason I believe that Bhakti without proper understanding can lead to fanaticism. History indicates that there were Vaishnavaits and Saivates who were killing each other in the name of Bhakti. This was no different from what Muslims did and still do and Christian did through crusade wars and still does by converting masses now by showing a caret instead of sword. In a same manner, Gyan without Bhakti can lead to intellectual arrogance. I feel that with true Bhakti, Gyan should develop; and with Gyan, Bhakti should develop. This we can see in our lives. We need the devotion (Bhakti) to achieve the goal we seek – And we develop understanding (Gyan) of the goal as we devoutly work to achieve it. These are similar to the two wings of a bird. So I do not see any meaning in arguing that Bhakti is superior to Gyan or Gyan is superior to Bhakti. Start anywhere that appeals to you -Bhakti or Gyan - if you have true devotion to the Lord, Bhakti, or true Gyan, a clear understanding, then one should develop the other. That in fact becomes the definition of what a true Bhakti or real Gyan is! Bhakti is not exhibition of intense emotionalism and Gyan is not the knowledge of the scriptures. These are neither necessary nor sufficient, and many a time can even be an obstruction if this is not supported by true Bhakti or true Gyan. Guidance from a proper teacher will help in avoiding our falling into these traps of fanaticism or arrogance. Ofcourse by definition “a proper teacher” does not guide us in the direction of fanaticism because that in the final analysis leads to self destruction.

At the end, everyone should know, as I have mentioned above there are 5 Supreme Personalities according to all Hindu scriptures. Every Sampradaya which are known as religious schools has their own syllabus from the authentic scriptures which contain, who is their Supreme Godhead, how to attain Bhakti to make Godhead happy, how to reach the higher level, what is the difference between the Brahm, Jeev and Maya, What is the ultimate goal? Etc

Because of their syllabuses we find so many theories, differences in our Hindu religion. Because when they talk in their syllabuses about their Godhead, they put other Gods down. Because of that innocent devotees get fanatic. According to Padma Puran, Four Vaisnava disciplic successions, inaugurated by Sri, Lord Brahma, Lord Rudra, and Sanaka, one of the four Kumaras, according to the scriptural source, appear in the holy place of Jaganatha Puri, and purify the entire earth during the Kali yuga (believed to be the current age in Hinduism). Sri chooses Ramanuja to represent her disciple succession. In the same way Lord Brahma chose Madhvacharya in Brahma sampradaya, Rudra chose Visnuswami in Rudra Sampradaya, and the four Kumaras chose Nimbaditya (Nimbarka Sampradaya).” Number of traditions due to assumption of the god-like status of their founder, rejected the parent sampradaya in favour of the new, as would be an example with Ramanandis, Gaudiya, Vallabhacharya and Swaminarayan. Shiv followers have also main sampradasy such as Samart Sampraday, Nandinatha Sampradaya, Adinath Sampradaya, Siva Advaita, Kashmir Shaivism, Pasupata, etc there is a one Sampraday for Shakti also. There are other schools of Yog like Hatha yog, Integral Yog who do the meditation of Brahm-The Supreme Personality, and few other philosophies like Nyaya, Samkhya, Vaisheshika, Purva mimamsa etc. Every other philosophy lead us to the ultimate goal.

If devotee wants to get rid of these confusions and philosophies, then he should follow one path ( any sampraday) which sounds appealing to him and helps him to gain the bhakti to reach the last goal. Because lastly every other Sampraday talks about Brahm-The Supreme soul. Vaishnav only read vaishnav scriptures and believe on that, Shaivs only read Lord Shiv scriptures and become fanatic. I would suggest to everyone, Follow one and respect everyone.

Seva Mahotsav was finishing on 15th of December 2008, and I had my first official Srimad Bhagwat Katha from 18th of December. I needed to prepare for that. For the first time I was going to face thousands of devotees and it was officially the time for me to act as a spiritual master. Due to the preparations I needed to do for this katha, I took a few days off from the altar. However, during this time, Lord Krishn played His lila on me. There was one very sincere devotee who I had blind faith on and I used to think that he is a role model for new devotees and that he could be a good inspiration for anyone but after I took my days off the alter, I found out few of his lies on some issues. I tried to calm myself down and asked him to confess as I had all the evidence lying in front of me, which was proving him to be a big time liar. He started to make false stories to prove himself right and I was shocked and felt used. On every one of his lies, I was feeling as if someone was stabbing me behind my back and I didn’t want to believe that a sincere devotee like him could speak lies. I got so disturbed. All of my followers and near & dear ones know I hate lies. If one can’t speak the truth in this world, is there any chance of that person speaking the truth to God? God resides in everyone’s heart. If we are lying to His devotees, we actually are lying to Him. I started to think, why did I even think to make him a role model for my devotees when she is lying to me after I gave him plenty of chances to confess? What kind of scriptures did he study till now? What kind of association has he had? I got so disturbed and started to point my finger on his every step. I started to think why is there any need to lie?

Due to this incident, I stopped my studies. On 17th December I reached Agra city where this katha was going to be held. I was completely unprepared. My disciples asked me if I was ready to speak or not after they saw my condition. I said that as the date is fixed and I have given my word nothing will change. I will not take a step back, either I am ready or not. I am ready to face this challenge. It is the Lord’s illusion and I’m here to recite Srimad Bhagwatam which is non different from the Lord. If the Lord wants me to recite katha, He would let me do it. On 18th December, everyone was busy in preparation and my Guru Maharaj came to attend the program. Before starting the Shrimad Bhagwatam procession, Guru Maharaj asked me if I needed any kind of help. I was so hopeless because I didn’t prepare anything. I didn’t know what would I speak. I asked him to give me some tips. Lastly He said that an Acharya don’t take any tension an that God will show you the right way.

Confidence is the key of my every success. I was confident but wasn’t prepared well enough. After the procession the katha started. It was my first time sitting on the Vyas Aasan and acting as a Guru. After giving the first days class, I went to Gurudev to touch his feet. He took me on the side, and asked me where the nectar was in my katha?  He was disappointed after attending my first days katha. But in a sweet way he realized my mistakes. After he left, I met my maternal uncle who spoke on all my mistakes. I didn’t speak a single word to either of them because on the other hand I was trying to work on that devotee and pushing him to confess for the sake of God. My first impression was bad. After having a long talk with my uncle, I went to meditate and focus on reality. Everyone had big hopes from me and I didn’t want to let them down. After finishing my second days katha I saw the face of one of my followers who looked a bit disturbed, I felt his feelings and he wasn’t happy with the way I was giving class. On the third day I stopped thinking about that boy and focused on my katha. I felt as if this boy was like an illusion and diverting my mind from Harikatha.

I found such a big change in me as well as in the audience. On the first day, a local devotee of Agra told me that not more than 20 people will attend my katha because in the past many big Katha speakers had orgnised their katha in the same venue and never got any success. I replied to them, “Let’s see, God organize this katha and He is listening to the katha. So, I’m not in any tension.”
On my third day, everyone started to jump like anything. They started to feel the big change and were getting the nectar of Hari Katha. After I ignored this boy, he actually came to confess me. I almost fainted seeing the Lord’s lila. I was like… God! What kind of lila is this? The next day, I found my answer in Srimad Bhagwtam, “If you go to maya, you will not get anything. If you come to Me, you will find the real nectar.” On the fourth day, which was the day of Janmastami according to Srimad Bhagwatam and was a Sunday too, I came for katha and found more than a thousand devotees sitting and waiting to hear my katha. I looked at those local devotees and they were speechless.

From that day, the Agra local tv channel started to broadcast my katha and all the big personalities of Agra started to come. Many of them used to escape their offices to hear katha.

On the last day, I remember that moment when I was leaving and devotees were crying and running behind my car. They were touching my feet, grabbing to hug me, crying for more hari katha. The love, the care, the affection I got from them in 7 days is unforgettable.

Last 7 days I am on the altar and worshipping my Lord. This is the time when I feel so blessed by my Sweetest and NAUGHTIEST LORD. If I get a chance to define Him. I can define Him only in one word. He is RASCAL.. He always plays with Goswamis… very wildly… And we can’t win against Him… We always have to BEG Him or show our anger to leave us to do His worship. Even on His appearance day, I was tieing His turban before abhisheka. But I failed… I was trying for 30 mins… to tie the turban… But somehow, it was falling. At last, angrily with the irritation, I told Him, If You (Radha Ramanji) want to take a abhisheka then get ready, otherwise, I am leaving you in this condition… I won’t take you outside for the abhisheka… and I am going back home… be here alone… Can you believe this? After that I tied His turban in 2 mins…

After dressing Him… I went to collect Yamuna water with young Goswamis…. I was heading them… you know what??? Because of the turban incident… abhisheka started 30 mins late… Last one week I am doing morning Seva of Him… It is very tough to do. And luckily, I am the youngest one who is doing His worship alone. Otherwise, All Elder Goswamis don’t give the permission to any young Goswami. Even many of my cousin brothers (My older Goswami brothers) still didn’t get the chance to do any worship of Him… even they are on the altar last many years… To do the worship of HIM. Sri Radha Ramanji is very sophisticated. Because He is a Naughty Kid and He is the King of the Universe… Our Seva on the altar? It is Bhaav Seva. We don’t do Rajsi Seva. When I go on the altar, I only feel that I am right now in Heaven… or should I say I can’t compare heaven by that feeling which I get on the altar. Everyday, new experience with Him makes me feel good. Even His naughtiness gives me a feeling of His presence in His room. I am so lucky to HAVE Him in my life. I love my God He is the very Sweetest in the world. By His grace I got the chance to serve Him in this life. My thousand _o/_ on His lotus feet…